Category Archives: Regional

The Pace of Things

With the forecast today predicting that it will hit between 101 and 107 here, and given that we live in a house with no air conditioning, life will move at a snail’s pace around here today.

Claire’s fever finally broke on Friday (until then it was pretty high, around 103.4). We saw the doctor on Tuesday afternoon; he said it wasn’t hand-foot-mouth disease because he saw no cankers in her mouth or throat. It was simply a garden-variety virus that would run its course and that I should keep her hydrated and as comfortable as possible. She says still that her throat hurts and she sounds hoarse, but she’s back to eating almost regularly and playing.

That meant my birthday and the rest of the week was fairly low-key and solitary, but this is okay. I got to hold and cuddle one of my best gifts ever. I will say, though, that if I were graded as a parent based solely on Thursday, I’d probably get a C or D. It was a rough day for us both, and I handled it with less grace than I could have.

The goal today is to stay cool and well.

Ah, California

You know you are in California when:

  1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.
  2. You make over $250,000 and still can’t afford a house.
  3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.
  4. Your child’s 3rd grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze.
  5. You can’t remember…is pot illegal?
  6. You’ve been to more than one baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.
  7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown and can taste the difference between Sumatra and Ethiopian.
  8. You also know which Brentwood restaurant serves the freshest arugula.
  9. A really great parking space can move you to tears.
  10. A low speed pursuit will interrupt any TV broadcast.
  11. Gas cost 75 cents per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.
  12. A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps. You don’t even notice.
  13. A woman gets on the bus with live poultry. You don’t even notice.
  14. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney is George Clooney.
  15. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.
  16. The gym is packed at 3 p.m. On a work day.
  17. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who delivers your mail is into BDSM, and your Mary Kay rep is a guy in drag.
  18. It’s sprinkling and there’s a report on every news station about “Storm Watch 09”.
  19. You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00 Tae Bo class.
  20. Your paperboy has a two-picture deal.
  21. The three-hour traffic jam you just sat through wasn’t caused by a horrific nine-car freeway pileup, but by everyone slowing to rubberneck at a lost shoe lying on the shoulder.
  22. The weatherman talks about the weather in other parts of the country, as if we really care.
  23. You pass an elementary school and the children are all busy with their cell phones or pagers.
  24. It’s sprinkling outside, so you leave for work an hour or two early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.
  25. You and your dog have therapists.

Disappointment

Well, we were going to make an offer on the house today, and as of yesterday there were supposedly no offers (we went to see it last evening), but today we learned there were four offers and one was accepted. The accepted offer was the asking price. We were going to offer less, so we wouldn’t have been accepted anyway. But it was a nice house, the first one in our price range that we could see ourselves living in and enjoying, with a lovely front and back yard. I’m sad and frustrated. It was a nice neighborhood — not near the train tracks, with a really good public school, good yard, nice interior, reasonable commute. It did, however, have an intense curry smell from the past occupants. Curry is fried with oil and then it permeates all surfaces (paint, rugs, etc.). Curry can be difficult to completely eradicate, and it’s not our favorite scent. So it’s one less problem.

I’ll continue to take a break from looking, and Husband will continue to go to open houses on the really good ones, and we’ll keep hoping.

In The Moment

Life is prodding me to stay present and not borrow trouble in the future. This is a discipline, one that requires traipsing after my thoughts like I do after my toddler.

The microwave broke again, despite our being careful not to use the front burner to cook steamy things (which apparently caused the circuits to short out last December, because the cupboards are not built to code, and the microwave is too close to the stovetop). It was a very expensive ($400+) repair the first time. Do you know how much we use a microwave? Dozens of times a day.

I mentioned this frustration at a play date, and another mother gave me a microwave that was sitting unused in her garage. They’ve bought a new house, so it’s one less thing for her to move as well. My problem is half-solved!
—
My knee has been cracking more frequently of late. Yes, the knee that had surgery. It’s not the kneecap (though that cracks a little occasionally), but the femur and tibia crack when I walk up stairs or move certain ways. It hurts, too. I can’t produce the problem on command, however, so pinpointing it will be hard. I’ve started to compensate for my lack of confidence in that leg by limping a little, which has worsened the pain in my left heel as well. I feel old again. There will be no easy solution to this.
—
This morning my little Eclaire and Husband gave me sweet cards that made me cry, some perfume (“my” scent that I’ve used 15 years), and Lindor truffles. Husband got up with me at 6 a.m. and made us pancakes for breakfast. We went to a park for 90 minutes, and then we went to look at a house. We liked it. It might be the one. But we’ll see. Mustn’t get ahead of ourselves.
—

For Me

After nap, I went out with Claire to run an errand, and I found myself driving past the Chung Tai Zen Center of Sunnyvale. I’d heard of them a couple years ago but never pursued actually locating the center. I’d also been on a mailing list for another Zen center in Mountain View, but I just haven’t gotten there yet.

As I drove by, I told myself I’d stop in next Wednesday when the babysitter relieves me for awhile. Then I changed my mind, because I felt nudged to take action right then. So I unloaded Claire (who was wearing her cheap sunglasses on a rainy day) and carried her in with me.

I was greeted effusively by a monk who was very sweet to Claire. I told them I had stopped in on a whim and that I wondered if they held sessions or classes. I was introduced to the Vice Abbott who gave me some handouts. He had led us to a classroom where he I think planned to give me time to read the material and then return to answer questions I had, but with Claire that wasn’t feasible. So we chatted briefly, and I learned that they are just about to offer their next session of classes. Each class is two hours, with the first hour being instruction and the second being meditation.

The level 1 class involves learning about meditation methods: breath-counting, mindfulness of the breath, middle way reality (a Zen practice). The topics covered are introduction to Buddhism and Zen, Karma and causality, the Four Noble Truths (suffering, the causes of suffering, nirvana, the Noble Eightfold Path), Three Refuges, Five Precepts. This class is on Saturday afternoons and is three months long.

The one hitch is that the time of class, 3-5 p.m., falls directly into the time we usually attend open houses. Some open houses are only held on Saturdays. While we are taking May off from searching, we do plan to return to house hunting later. My attendance at class will interfere with this. But this is something I really need. Husband supports me doing this, and I consider my timing propitious.

So that’s where I will spend next Saturday afternoon. Yay me.

Already Over

Today was my last day of physical therapy. I felt a little wistful, because I’ve gone twice a week for six weeks, and you get to know the therapists and aides a bit. I would highly recommend Santa Clara Sports Therapy to anyone; they are professional and friendly, and the atmosphere is not at all intimidating. I’m going to miss Ray, the therapist who worked on my knee the most. He was always upbeat and helpful, and his massages were thorough. My knee still has some swelling and occasional pain, but I’m fairly mobile and my legs are much stronger.
—
There was a confirmed case of swine flu in a local high school. Branham high school was closed for a week; the infected student had recently traveled to southern California. There are three other probable cases of swine flu in Santa Clara county as well. While Husband and I don’t want to overreact, we decided to cancel our outing to the SF Zoo on Sunday. We figured it’s unwise to be exposed to hundreds of people and the surfaces they touch, and caution doesn’t cost us anything. The zoo isn’t going anywhere.

Do The Right Thing

It’s Earth Day. One of our kitchen fluorescent tube lights burned out and we have to dispose of it. After some Googling, I found this information for California:

A fluorescent light tube in your dumpster is a violation of the hazardous waste laws. Violation of these laws can result in large fines and criminal prosecution.

Fluorescent tubes contain mercury and become hazardous wastes when they no longer work. Mercury poses especially serious hazards to pregnant women and small children. Non-working tubes must be recycled by an authorized recycling firm and cannot be discarded in the trash.

Fluorescent tubes and bulbs may be managed as universal wastes under Title 22, Chapter 23 of the California Code of Regulations. This allows those who wish to discard their fluorescent tubes and lamps to do so more easily than if they were managed as hazardous wastes.

Although spent fluorescent lights can not go into the trash, there are several options for getting them to an environmentally safe and responsible recycler.

For residential disposal, you can do the following:

Find a partner in the Take-It-Back Program and drop it off (such as Orchard Supply Hardware).

Find the local Household Hazardous Waste Facility to take fluorescent tubes
and bulbs along with other universal wastes — search Earth911 or the Department of Toxic Substances Control.

This and more information for California is in this PDF.

Ah, Insomnia

Today was the first really warm day of the year: 95 degrees. And I, as usual, can’t sleep because it is still warm inside and out.

We went to see a house yesterday and today. The yesterday house we liked well enough, more for its location than perhaps the interior, but the price is higher than we feel comfortable going. The house we saw today was, well, just another frakking house. It was well-priced, but there were several problems with it, and it just didn’t stand out to us. Husband and I agreed that it is time to take a break — for me, not for him. We have spent every single Saturday and Sunday since the first weekend in January looking at houses. We have done nothing else, because after working around Claire’s nap and the open house schedules (1-4 p.m.), there is usually little time for any family trips elsewhere. We do get to a park after each foray, which we all enjoy.

But I’m weary. I’m rather depressed at the prices and the quality of the houses we see for those prices. I have not had any “me time” on the weekends for several months. The only weekend we took off from looking was the weekend immediately after my surgery. Husband used to take Claire on long walks in the neighborhood that afforded me time to clean, do laundry, etc. or just be home alone.

So I don’t know how long our break will be. The good thing all this research has done is that it has helped us clarify exactly what kind of house we would like to buy (e.g., square footage, small yard, recent build, etc.). It’s just that we haven’t found it yet. Next weekend, however, we will go on an outing to a zoo or museum — something fun.

And I’m working on cleaning out my closets of old clothes and stuff that feels extraneous. I’m not touching art supplies or yarn. I just need to streamline a little or I’ll go mad.

Here’s hoping sleep comes soon. I really need it.

Still Trying To Wrap My Brain Around This

Apparently it’s all doom an gloom still in the housing market. We’re still looking to see what’s out there that we can possibly afford without risking our necks and also feel comfortable living in. Please note in the quote below what is considered the “low end” of home values here. We’re talking about houses, condos, and town homes that are 1,200 to 1,900 square feet.

“Sales are up dramatically,” said Jim Klinge, an agent in San Diego. “There’s a group of buyers that need housing more than they need to pay attention to the doom and gloom headlines we see every single day.”

Many of his buyers are young people who are backed financially by their parents. Mr. Klinge noted that all the sales were on the low end, which in San Diego means less than $500,000.

—Record Drop in January Index of Home Prices

We went looking at new construction last weekend. I have to admit there’s a huge appeal to shiny new homes. Especially at these prices. If you’re going to spend that kind of dough, getting something fresh and new makes sense. These homes aren’t complete, so when you purchase you can choose what counters, paint colors, floors, etc. you want. So, shiny and new is attractive, unless you want a postage stamp yard (i.e., a detached single family home). If you want actual land with your house, you get much less interior space or house that needs some work.

One of the realities I am struggling to accept (I have actively resisted) is that we live in an urban area. I cannot recreate the neighborhood in which I grew up. We will never own a house with the size yard that I enjoyed. I cannot do this because it’s just so dense and intense here. Claire is having her childhood, not mine. It’s a fact of our lives that we live an urban existence. I need to find what is good about that for her sake and mine.

Drama We Don’t Like

A couple months ago, two blocks from here where I walk with Claire, a man brandishing a gun wandered the streets and was shot by police when he refused to drop the weapon. I think he survived. I haven’t heard anything about it since, but it’s disconcerting. We could have been taking a walk in that area at the moment.

Last night six people died in a family murder-suicide in an area of Santa Clara where friends live, and where we have looked at housing. Of course, these tragedies happen all over, even in rural areas.

We just had an earthquake here at 10:40 a.m. Not huge, but a reminder of a restless earth.

Busy Weekend, Then Back to Work

Tomorrow my “vacation” ends, and Husband’s vacation begins — both of us will be going back to work. His vacation is from me and from full-time waiting on two demanding females. 😉 My break was the two weeks of healing from surgery, and I’m mostly mobile. We’ll see how I fare tomorrow!

Yesterday we went to an open house in an area of San Jose we rather like, and then we drove up to Hayward to purchase a used Schwinn recumbent stationary bike for me. When we got home we realized it’s a few inches too long for the space we thought it would fit, so we had a long discussion about our stuff and how much house we need in the future. We also talked about how much house we can afford and looked hard at the numbers in several scenarios. We came away with a better sense of our priorities.

Today we toured seven different model homes in Fremont and Morgan Hill. All of them were vertical (three townhomes and four houses), and my knee communicated its displeasure at the end of the day. However, we saw some things that have potential. Then around 6:30 we met some friends at Choi’s Korean restaurant. The girls had fun eating the glass noodles and other food, and it was good to get out with friends. We’re all tired out. Claire is just going to bed now, and we hope dearly that she will sleep long and well. We rarely miss bedtime (8 p.m.), but now and then a special occasion is okay. She is a really patient and cooperative child while we wander through homes every weekend.

So Far This Week

It’s been a low-key week so far. I wasn’t my usual social self; in fact, I’ve been a little cross now and then. I had an upset GI tract on Monday, a small bout of flu or something. Aunt LP was a huge help to Husband while I was knocked out much of the time, and Claire adored her. We did get to visit a little, but as I wasn’t the most chipper host I’m sure my company left something to be desired. 🙂 She left this afternoon, and I’m wishing her good travels. Her flight was delayed and left her with no connections from Houston to Austin (spring break, SXSW events), so I’m hoping she got a standby flight.

I got my stitches out on Tuesday. I had two tears in the meniscus. One was large and folded under; it caused the most damage. I have arthritis in the area now. I start physical therapy tomorrow for six weeks. I can put 100 percent weight on my leg for short amounts of time, but it tires easily. Heck, I tire easily. I seem to have no energy. I stopped taking the narcotic painkillers on Saturday, but I still feel a little loopy and off-balance. I won’t be driving a car until I’m off crutches, which is probably around March 28. Husband will be off the rest of this week and all of next taking care of us. He’s been amazing.

Claire has bonded a lot more with her Daddy than ever before. He takes her out every day for an hour or two at a park, which has done him a lot of good as well. She cries for me and has tantrums when I’m not available, but I’ve noticed she’s become his little buddy and helper too. Her vocabulary continues to grow and her sentences become more varied and complex. She’s going through another growth spurt or something. One day she basically ate all day in large amounts, had a long nap, and this morning she slept in until 7 a.m. I swear she looks different from one week ago.

Day Two

Claire woke at 7:15 a.m. and started the day well. She didn’t ask for milk until late in the morning. She still refuses milk in a cup and gets mad when it’s offered. But she’s eating a LOT of other food, including 9 ounces of yogurt today.

While I cooked this evening, I offered milk in a “take and toss” cup — a simple plastic cup with a lid. She sat on the kitchen floor and played with it. Then she took a sip and had a whole conversation with herself, most of which was garbled — she has her own language and syntax. But we did hear her say “bottles” and “fairy” and “milk” and “cup.” Then she began playing with the cup and dripping milk on the floor. I stopped that after a few minutes, but the fact she took a sip and was talking to herself about it is heartening.

Oh, and she skipped nap today. We put her down but she wouldn’t sleep. So we went out to look at houses and go to a park, where she enjoyed herself thoroughly. I also had a long conversation with another mother I met there with whom I felt a connection. We traded email addresses, so perhaps something will grow out of it.