Husband and I are about to watch the very last episode of Battlestar Galactica. I saw a headline that said it was immersion therapy for the post 9/11 world. It’s a dark series, but it has richly developed characters and is intensely interesting. I’m eager to know how they resolve all this. I’ve never been much of a sci-fi fan, but this series encompasses so much more than what people might think when they consider the genre.
Category Archives: Recreation
Coming Up Empty
Despite my intentions of spending recovery time knitting or doing some other creative sedentary venture, I’ve let it all languish. I feel desperately un-creative. I look at my yarn stash and think, “I’ll never use this stuff, and it’s taking up space,” and struggle with the desire to get rid of it. Same with my art supplies. I feel an urge to simplify. It’s astonishing to me what accumulates over time, and if we decide to move this year, a we need to lighten our load. So I’m feeling restless to do this.
Plus we may purchase a stationary bike for me, and where is that going to go? I still have two boxes of maternity clothes in the closet.
I’ve been really successful in keeping new book acquisition to a minimum.
I just don’t know what to do with this impulsive energy.
Once upon a time I didn’t make stuff — I didn’t make arts or crafts, and I didn’t have closets full of supplies. My life was simpler. I read and I exercised. Now I waste so much time on the Internet — I do read, too, but exercise doesn’t happen. And I need to make that happen.
What a disjointed post.
April Is The Cruelest Coolest Month
Interesting article here: The End of Verse? Or, I can summarize it for you.
Verse is not dead yet.
As long as there is language
poems will exist.
April is National Poetry Month. It’s also NaPoWriMo. I tried this in 2006 and burned out halfway through the month, although some of what I wrote I thought was solid. I’m giving this year a pass, though who know? I might quietly be inspired to try. If I pretend I don’t really care, maybe I can fool myself into playing and actually accomplish it.
Self-Care Progress
In 2008 I let many aspects of self-care slide, so I endeavor to do better this year. I didn’t make any resolutions. I just made a list of the appointments I had not accommodated last year and set out to get them scheduled and accomplished. As of this date I have achieved the following:
- Eye exam (new Rx)
- Dental cleaning (with the next one scheduled)
- Mammogram (all clear)
- Knee repair (in progress)
- Annual exam/bloodwork (all fine)
The first quarter of the year hasn’t passed yet and I’ve done a lot! In fact, I don’t think I have any other major health issues requiring visits to professionals. I’m not due for a pap smear until next year, and all my immunizations are up-to-date.
Next on the list for self-care is to exercise more, lose some weight, and find a group with whom to meditate (perhaps the Kannon Do Zen Center). I also may, if our lives aren’t upended by moving chaos, manage to attend the Mother’s Plunge Retreat in June.
Somewhere in all of this exercising and meditating I will slip in the occasional knitting project, or a drawing or collage, perhaps a little poem writing, and as always, something to read.
Oh, Baby, I Love You So
She’s my sweetheart.
So Far This Week
It’s been a low-key week so far. I wasn’t my usual social self; in fact, I’ve been a little cross now and then. I had an upset GI tract on Monday, a small bout of flu or something. Aunt LP was a huge help to Husband while I was knocked out much of the time, and Claire adored her. We did get to visit a little, but as I wasn’t the most chipper host I’m sure my company left something to be desired. 🙂 She left this afternoon, and I’m wishing her good travels. Her flight was delayed and left her with no connections from Houston to Austin (spring break, SXSW events), so I’m hoping she got a standby flight.
I got my stitches out on Tuesday. I had two tears in the meniscus. One was large and folded under; it caused the most damage. I have arthritis in the area now. I start physical therapy tomorrow for six weeks. I can put 100 percent weight on my leg for short amounts of time, but it tires easily. Heck, I tire easily. I seem to have no energy. I stopped taking the narcotic painkillers on Saturday, but I still feel a little loopy and off-balance. I won’t be driving a car until I’m off crutches, which is probably around March 28. Husband will be off the rest of this week and all of next taking care of us. He’s been amazing.
Claire has bonded a lot more with her Daddy than ever before. He takes her out every day for an hour or two at a park, which has done him a lot of good as well. She cries for me and has tantrums when I’m not available, but I’ve noticed she’s become his little buddy and helper too. Her vocabulary continues to grow and her sentences become more varied and complex. She’s going through another growth spurt or something. One day she basically ate all day in large amounts, had a long nap, and this morning she slept in until 7 a.m. I swear she looks different from one week ago.
In The Shop
I’m going “into the shop tomorrow” — my surgery is at 1:15 p.m. Here’s hoping it all goes smoothly and that I’m soon pain-free and mobile again.
I’ve been in a somewhat dark and tight mental space in the past week. Concerns about surgery, the outcome, and a certain loneliness from a disconnected friendship have contributed to a sense of isolation. I reached my limit with Claire one morning and boy, was that a little loud and scary! Husband agreed I need more “free” time, and we are figuring out how that will work. And hey, what are cupboard doors for if not to shut them firmly and vigorously now and then?
Heh. As of tomorrow afternoon, I’ll have a lot of free time for a few days. I’ve got a pile of books and all my knitting gear by my bed. Aunt LP arrives Saturday evening. I’m excited about this, though I’m not sure she knows what she’s getting into!
We went to the park this afternoon, where I took a zillion photos and videos since I finally remembered to pack the camera. It was mid-60s, sunny, breezy, and I was rejuvenated. Claire is such an explorer! And I love her more and more and more.
Fearless
Claire has a cold, but she’s not so sick that she isn’t restless. Today was better, so in the afternoon we went to a park to romp in the sunshine. She’s getting more coordinated each day, and climbs like a little monkey on all the play structures — even the ones designed for 7-12 year olds. It was around rush hour when Caltrain runs a lot of trains; we were near the station, and she was transfixed by the horn every time she heard it.
So we went to the station, where we saw four trains go by. One was a Union Pacific double-engine chugging slowly up and down the track for no apparent reason. One was a local train that stopped in Santa Clara; the other two were express trains that barreled through at 70 miles an hour. It is a sight and sound to behold! Tons and tons of steel roar past, creating a wind suction that would knock a child over. Claire was in her stroller and I put my arm around her; I was concerned this experience would frighten her.
Her response: “Big train! Big train! Toot!” This was followed by her usual monologue spoken in Claireish with an occasional word I recognize. She was intensely interested. I, on the other hand, find these roaring trains exciting and terrifying, in part because I am capable of imagining dreadful things (which I try to avoid).
I have my own train to face in a few days. I do not like undergoing general anesthesia. I have an irrational fear that I might not wake up. Again, I do my best not to feed it, but the anxiety hums underneath. I’m also not looking forward to being immobilized, to losing control of the way my house runs, to my daughter crying because I can’t get up to play with her, and to pain.
On the other hand, this is the first time in 18 months that I will have the opportunity to sleep as much as I want and rest. That is a comforting thought. Another comfort is that my playgroup has a program to help moms in need, and people volunteered to bring food during my confinement. We’ll get eight meals from generous mothers.
Show And Tell
Doings
Last night I enjoyed my annual extravagant outing with several friends. We went to SF for a delicious dinner at Roy’s Hawaiian Fusion Cuisine and then saw a vibrant musical, Wicked. I had a fine, fine time!
Alas, while there is much happening, I’ve got zero energy and time to write, but I’ll try later in the week to catch up.
A Finished Object
At last, I finished something so very simple that I started last July. It’s an accessory scarf. Not sure what I’ll do with it; I’ll probably package it up and store it as a “someday gift” for someone, or maybe one of these days I’ll get going on an Etsy shop and try to sell online.
In any case, this is the outcome of my creative efforts this week.
Updated to add: Why wait? If you want it, you can buy it.
Creativity In The Kitchen
A dinner for two:
Quinoa and Portobellos
2 portobello mushrooms
1 medium onion
1 Tbsp. safflower or olive oil
Pinch of salt
1 tsp. dried chopped basil
Black pepper to taste
1 cup of quinoa
1 3/4 cups water (or use vegetable stock)
Rinse the quinoa well. Bring water and quinoa to a boil in a pot. Reduce the heat to a simmer, leave the lid on partially. Turn off the heat after about 15 minutes and let it stand.
Meanwhile, slice the mushrooms and onions into strips (not finely chopped). Over medium heat, sauté onions and mushrooms in the oil for about 10-15 minutes, until vegetables are tender and a little carmelized. Add basil and black pepper, then serve over a bed of quinoa with a lettuce salad on the side.
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I thought this was very tasty. Husband dutifully ate some; he doesn’t like portobellos. But maybe I’ll make it again to eat for lunch.
Play All Day
It’s late. Here’s this week’s work for Creative Every Day. This is one of the things I do all day. Every day. Don’t let the brevity of my text lead you to think I dislike this or find it a chore. I enjoy each day, even if I do find it a little challenging to keep thinking up new stuff to draw (or to keep repeating the same thing because Claire’s focused on it. For example, one day it was the letter X. She wanted me to write X all the time.) No, the shortness of this post (in terms of word count) has to do with my level of exhaustion. In this case, several pictures are worth several hundred (or thousand) words!
And here is what the bottle fairy looks like! (Created on the fly. No pun intended.) We’ve been telling Claire about her. She can say who it is when she sees the picture, and she says “Bye-bye bottle” when asked what the fairy does. I don’t know that she comprehends what is really coming, though. Time will tell. I’m waiting on delivery of the item that the fairy will leave. I also need to get to a point of mentally committing to doing this, and to let go of my attachment to this particular way of being intimate. We have many many other cuddles and intimate times. She’s getting almost too big to hold like a baby anymore.
If Only I Were A Ladybug
Husband is a researcher. For months he has diligently tracked the housing market to see if house prices will enter a range we can afford. In the past couple of weeks, we have taken field trips to various parks in San Jose neighborhoods to see if we like the area, and to see what our money could buy. Unfortunately, this also means a much longer commute for Husband. He works in Mountain View, although this is not a given forever. Yet we cannot afford to buy a house north of Santa Clara.
So far, we’ve learned that the house we want (about 1,400-1,700 square feet, two baths, and a small yard) we can’t afford in certain neighborhoods (or we can only afford a town home, but those rarely have yards), and the houses priced so that we could buy are in neighborhoods that are run down or downright scary. It still galls me that $500,000 can only buy a shack. But we will continue to look, to eliminate areas and narrow down a few regions we might afford. Then we’ll see what happens to the market. It continues to move in our favor, but we’re still talking scads of money. Since we already pay $2,200 a month for rent — and since we know it will go up again this year — we might be better off at least getting some equity built up (though it will take many, many years for that to happen).
I took the photo below at the San Francisco Zoo. If only my housing issues were as simple as a ladybug’s. This looks like an inviting place.
Stealing A Moment (At 16 Months)
While Claire naps (fitfully today, I might add), I’m going to crank out a post about her.
First of all, her language acquisition is amazing. When asked what a rooster says, she replies with “Cocka do do!” When she eats food she likes, she says, “Mmmm, ‘licious!” (for delicious). She is game to try saying any word or phrase and often comes very close. She always asks, “Doing?” and we describe what we are doing to her. She is saying short sentences, such as “Mommy brush hair,” or “Daddy go potty.” Her fourth molar is nearly through completely, thank goodness. Then we’ll have cut the four canine teeth and then some peace until the last molars come in around 24-36 months.
She has quite a will, and it shows in several ways. For example, in the first year of her life, on rare occasions we would go upstairs to watch a PBS show called Between the Lions. It’s a language show featuring a muppet-like family of lions that run a library. (The pun is twofold — you go between the lions into the library, and you can read between the lines to understand more.) Anyhow, she had seen it maybe ten times in her first year. About five days ago, Claire stood at the bottom of the stairs, pointed up and demanded, “Lions! Lions!” and made her lion roar. When we understood what she wanted, we took her up to watch an episode. Now it’s a daily request. It doesn’t matter if she’s seen the episode before; repetition is how kids learn, after all. So I figure 30 minutes a day won’t hurt. We watch with her, although we do this in part because the room is NOT child-proofed. I also reserve the right to say no, but this usually creates a tantrum.
I also recently introduced crayons and a spiral drawing book. (I tried the toddler crayons, but her hands are too small to hold them, and she prefers the regular shape anyhow.) Several times a day Claire requests “Crayons! Crayons!” I take them out and draw pictures for her, then write out the word. She says, “Again!” and “Drawing, writing.” She tries to scribble and is still working on her grip. Her grandparents gave her wooden blocks with letters, and more than making towers, she loves to have us spell out words with them. Her other grandma gave her a Leapfrog game (but it cost much less than the Amazon price) that resembles a computer (she is dying for one of ours) that teaches letters and sounds. Several months ago, Claire knew the letters O, Q, T and X; since Christmas, she has learned to identify A, B, C, D, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, R, S, W and Z. I’ve lost track of her vocabulary, but it’s large.
The last area where her will is formidable is the milk in the bottle issue. She still refuses milk in a sippy cup. She still wants to take milk in a bottle with only me holding her. She can produce a huge tantrum if other options are offered. So, I’ve got a plan. Did you know there is a bottle fairy? She comes to children who are ready to drink milk out of cups and takes away all the bottles and leaves a gift! (A mother at preschool told me this idea, which she said worked with her 19-month-old.) I talked to our pediatrician, and she loved the idea; she thinks it’s a gentler way to introduce the transition (though there will still probably be tears). She suggested I talk about this to Claire for a couple weeks; tell her about the fairy, show pictures (which I will have to draw), and build it up. The gift that the fairy will bring is a rocking horse. At the holiday party last weekend, Claire monopolized the rocker there, and since then she has tried to rock on every type of rocker she has seen at the park and preschool. Rocking soothes her (she does it a lot even without a rocker). I couldn’t find one locally I liked, so I ordered one from Little Tikes.
I will say this: she has relatively few tantrums, and usually it’s due to a thwarted desire and not to frustration over being misunderstood. We have the good fortune that she speaks as many words as she does and that she enunciates so well. It could be worse!
We adore her so much!











