Category Archives: Miscellaney

Http://hestia.blogspot.com Is Not Owned By Kathryn Petro Anymore

I am learning a major lesson about the disadvantage of the Internet. There is no person or place to go to when one has a problem, so one’s ability to get results is nearly nonexistent. It’s like getting caught on automated phone hell, only without the crappy muzak.

Case in point: I once had a blog called The Hestia Chronicles on Blogger. When I started my practice, I realized my real life name associated with the blog would be confusing to clients. So I deleted that blog and requested the archives be deleted. Supposedly this was done (although I now see that a link to an archive still appears in a Google search). What I was not warned about, however, was that by deleting my blog the url would be made available to someone else to use. Blogger help (FAQ) said nothing about this, leading me to believe that deletion would be complete — that the url would be retired and made unavailable.

Imagine my outrage and dismay when I did a Google search for my name, Kathryn Petro, and discovered that the the first result was the old url, and that it had been hijacked by porn spammers. My name is printed in huge letters, and beneath that are a number of links for X-rated sites. There is no email address or other means of identifying and communicating with the hijacker.

So I emailed Blogger — twice — about this. Today they responded as follows.

Thank you for your note. When you deleted your blog, you essentially made it available to be registered by another user. Blogger is a provider of content creation tools, not a mediator of that content. We allow our users to create blogs, but we don’t make any claims about the content of these pages. In cases where a contact email address is listed on the page, we recommend working directly with the author to have this information removed or changed.

-Blogger Support

In other words, too bad so sad. My name can now be bandied about in connection with pornography, never mind that my name and reputation are my stock in trade. Gee, thanks Blogger! I really appreciate your assistance and your attitude.

So, for the record, I am writing this post to clarify that I no longer own the content at http://hestia.blogspot.com. The name, Kathryn Petro, has been taken against my knowledge and will by someone anonymous and misused for their purposes. And Blogger will DO NOTHING about this.

Beware of Blogger! You should probably beware of any content management system and any urls you create through them. Had I known about the policy of making it available to whomever, I would have kept the url and simply redirected seekers to my website.

Update, 4:32 p.m.:

I am very grateful to a friend, Chip Rosenthal, Dave Haxton, and Tony Petro (my blogless brother) for their advocacy and advice on how to handle this. It was determined to be in violation of Blogger’s terms of service. I also thank Evan Williams, co-founder of Pyra (the company that started Blogger), for responding with alacrity. The situation has been corrected. Blogger Support responded with:

Hi Kathryn,

Thank you for writing back. We have investigated further into the account you reported and concluded that they are violating the Terms of Service as you have indicated. We have removed the specific blog that you inquired about. It should no longer be viewable although may remain in search engine’s caches for a short period of time.

Thank you for using Blogger,
Blogger Support

I hope that this doesn’t happen again, but my faith in the possibility of resolving such problems has been restored.

Update, 6:05 p.m.:

At Chip’s suggestion, I tried to re-register the url and succeeded. So I now have control over the content, although I don’t know what I’ll do with it. I’m sure I’ll come up with something, someday.

Tales From Childhood

Edward at lactose incompetent wrote a hilarious piece on euphemisms used in childhood.

My grandmother was practically Queen Victoria for the iron-bound rules of proper conduct and social ettiquette she enforced. No words for bodily functions were allowed, not slang, not even proper scientific or anatomical terminology. Only the most obscure, bizarre euphemisms existed, a secret code apparently known only to the family lest some outsider discover that we did, in fact, perform the same unsavory human functions as everyone else. One did not fart, suffer flatulence, pass gas, break wind or even toot in our household; the word was “boop”. It is quite disturbing to recall that as a boy I did not have a penis, a dick, a wang, a doodle, a dingle, a thing, a pee-pee; I had a teapot.

Do read the entire post. It’s classic. I thank Edward for making me smile and reminding me how glad I am to be an adult.

A Fair Practice Policy

In my practice, the cancellation policy is simple. To avoid incurring a charge, I tell clients that cancellations must be made at least 24 hours in advance. If they cancel with less notice, they are still charged a session fee. This is standard protocol that most people accept.

However, having been a client, I think about the reverse situation: does the therapist owe a 24 hour notice to the client if she needs to cancel a session? Therapists I’ve seen have rarely missed session without notice; I’ve been well informed when they plan to take vacation, etc. But once in awhile people do get the flu, or the car breaks down, or something happens that prevents the therapist from being able to keep the appointment. The client is left without the meeting they may have come to depend on, with nothing given for the inconvenience.

This is why I decided to implement a policy of equivalence. If I need to cancel an appointment last-minute and can’t reschedule it within the next two days, then I don’t charge my client for the next session. In other words, I pay them for their time, just as I require them to pay me.

It just seems right and fair. After all, I work for the client.

Who I Am

I decided to write a short introduction to provide an idea of who I am. I’ve been conscientious about keeping this blog professionally oriented, but I also want there to be context, a way for the reader to connect with me. If you’re curious, you can read more here. It is, of course, the tip of the iceberg, but many such things are.

Of Necessity

I started writing this blog in late August, when I launched my private practice. Its purpose has been to provide a public service by posting about mental health topics/links and also by featuring words that provoke thought.

At the same time, I started a personal blog using a pseudonym. I’d had a personal blog previously, only my Real Life Name was connected to it. People searching for me as a therapist would discover it first, and this would not be helpful in therapy. So I had to delete it, but I could not delete the need for free, deeply personal expression. The personal blog features posts of my ordinary life, topics as mundane as my health renovation project (as I call it), what movie I saw, what I did last weekend, etc. It also features poetry and quotes, soul-searching exploration of meaning in my life, reminiscences, and so on.

I’ve noticed something. I spend much more time hanging out at that blog. It has twice as many visitors as this one. When I sit down to write in this blog, it feels like “work.” After all, it is part of my work. However, because I need to be mindful (pun intended) of my communication here, there is a rein on my thought process. I am far more passionate about my personal life, I suppose.

I’m not sure what to do about this, but perhaps writing about it will inspire me.

By the way, I’ve reopened comments. Due to spamming, I’d closed them until I could install a plug-in that will close the comments after X days. All previous posts will remain unavailable for commenting, though.

You Are(n’t) Getting Very Sleepy

The New York Times published an article exploring the problem of insomnia and medications used to treat it. Apparently two new drugs will be released for prescription in the near future.

Estimates of the number of people with insomnia vary widely. About 40 percent of adult Americans have at least occasional trouble sleeping, according to the National Sleep Foundation, which promotes understanding of sleep disorders and research on them. Some insomnia is temporary, caused by job worries, for instance.

But an estimated 10 to 15 percent of adults have severe or chronic insomnia. Many cases appear to be caused by an underlying condition like depression or painful arthritis, and the best approach is to treat that underlying condition. But for perhaps 15 to 30 percent of those with chronic insomnia, no known underlying disorder can be found.

Several studies have shown that people with insomnia are more likely than others to become depressed.

Lack of sleep, though not always caused by insomnia, can interfere with social life, job performance and driving. At least one study has shown that sleep deprivation results in poor glucose metabolism, a hallmark of diabetes.

Still, scientists cannot yet point to any study showing that treating insomnia with sleeping pills staves off depression or other diseases. Yet some experts say understanding the dangers of insomnia is only a matter of time.

— Putting a Price on a Good Night’s Sleep

American culture tends to eschew sleep in favor of doing. Additionally, we are stretched thin with regard to scheduling work and a social life; seduced and hypnotized by the glass eye most evenings; and captive to our geography, driving long distances to complete mundane tasks. We live with conveniences that save us time but rob us of physical exertion.

I deal with periodic insomnia and have occasionally used a prescribed medication. Does it work? Yes, but I rediscovered that regular exercise along with reduction in caffeine induces sleepiness and improves the quality of my rest. Exercise has restored my equilibrium so well that I will not seek a renewal of that prescription. I am dismayed that, rather than encouraging people to increase physical activity and decrease the amount of junk in their diets (which would also abate the trend of obesity in our country), we will instead be encouraged by medical marketing to just take a pill. For those with hard-core insomnia, this may be necessary; unfortunately, I think many people will be prescribed something that they could otherwise do without.

American Jesus

This new title — American Jesus: How the Son of God Became a National Icon — looks to be interesting. It’s an account of the many views humanity has had to Jesus, from superhuman to moral man, and how these perpectives have influenced culture.

From the excerpt of the book review by R. Scott Appleby in the New York Times:

As an author Mr. Prothero is nothing if not sly. Within his narrative, ostensibly a popular and often entertaining account of the rendering of Jesus in song, story and spirituality, he has embedded a fairly detailed history of American religion itself — one of the subtle achievements of “American Jesus.”

Equally subtle is his judgment that the persistence of Jesus’ presence in American culture, in whatever form, is proof that the United States is not a secularized nation. Yet Jesus’ success in insinuating himself into television, movies, popular song and the marketplace does not mean that he has transformed or even significantly influenced secular institutions and practices. Indeed, the influence has often worked in the opposite direction: American markets, politics and philosophy — not least, the perennial pull of pragmatism in all things — have pushed Christianity in the United States into forms and expressions unrecognizable to previous generations of Jesus’ followers.

More than one-third of “American Jesus” is devoted to the appropriation of Jesus by Hindus, Buddhists, Jews, the Dalai Lama and the Nation of Islam. In itself, this is fascinating and instructive material. For Prothero, the diffusion of Jesus into the thought worlds and sensibilities of non-Christian Americans constitutes the great triumph of the protean Jesus. Unfortunately, the celebration of Jesus’ ubiquity occasionally echoes a tired mantra: “Church bad, American individualism good. Religion bad, spirituality good. Christianity oppressive, other religions lighthearted.”

This is definitely going on the “to be read” list.

Words to Ponder #75

As a way of ushering in the New Year, here are two quotes for good measure.

Celebratin’ New Year’s Eve is like eatin’ oranges. You got to let go your dignity t’ really enjoy ’em.

–Edna Ferber, Buttered Side Down (1912)

The etiquette question that troubles so many fastidious people New Year’s Day is: How am I ever going to face those people again?

–Judith Martin, Miss Manners’ Guide to Excrutiatingly Correct Behavior (1982)

Happy New Year! See you in 2004.

Until Next Year

I’ll be taking a vacation from posting here for about the next two weeks. Company arrives on Tuesday for a five day visit, and then I travel to my hometown to celebrate Christmas with my folks, to return near the end of the year. Since I write about self-care in this blog, I’ve decided to follow my own advice and simplify my life. I will return, hopefully refreshed, on January 1. Please do come by then.

In the meantime, I encourage you to visit the blogs in my sidebar, where you will find numerous excellent voices to provoke thought, warm your heart, and entertain.

I wish you all a holiday season vibrant with joy and goodwill!

Namasté.

TGIF

For a dervish every day feels like
Friday, the beginning of a holiday,

a fresh setting out that will not have an
end. Dressed in the soul’s handsomeness,

you’re a whole month of Fridays, sweet
outside, sweet in. Your mind and your deep

being walk together as friends walk along
inside their friendship. Debris does not stay

in one place on a fast-running creek. Let
grudges wash out into the sea. Your soul’s

eye watches a spring-green branch moving,
while these other eyes love the old stories.

— Version by Coleman Barks, with Nevit Ergin
“The Glance”
Viking-Penguin, 1999

Managing Household Chaos

It’s That Time of Year again. You know, when you’re trying to buy and wrap gifts, manage your work schedule, keep up with your children’s events, find clean socks and something in the pantry for dinner, and prepare for company. But the house is a mess, and you’re overwhelmed. What to do?

This topic came up at a meeting recently, and someone mentioned FlyLady, a website devoted to household management strategies. A quick search also resulted in Get Organized Now, which also looks promising.

And if for some reason you have extra time, visit the “to go to” page of Not Martha, a weblog that focuses on the creative side of the good life — but apparently with less attitude than Ms. Stewart. The links on the “go to” page cover the gamut of food, craft suppliers, personal care products, and miscellaneous items of interest.

Reducing clutter and breaking household jobs into smaller tasks can help keep life manageable. But also remember that when you look back in your old age, it won’t matter how spotless your home was.

Words to Ponder #66

For months they have lain in wait, dim shapes lurking in the forgotten corners of houses and factories all over the country and now they are upon us, sodden with alcohol, their massive bodies bulging with strange green protuberances, attacking us in our homes, at our friends’ homes, at our offices — there is no escape, it is the hour of the fruitcake.

–Deborah Papier, in Insight (1985)

Deck the Halls

There are many upcoming events around Austin to enliven the advent of the holidays. Below are a few of them.

I heard there is a holiday art fair of sorts on South First street this weekend, starting on Thursday the 4th. At Jovita’s on Saturday around noon the South Austin Jug Band will perform. The South First street neighborhood sports a lot of funky, unique stores, cafes, and house decor. It’s an old neighborhood with lots of personality.

On Friday, December 12 at 7:30 p.m., the Austin Civic Orchestra will perform holiday favorites at St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church at Steck and Mesa. The events have general seating; General Admission is $8.00; Senior/Student is $6.00; Children under 12, admission is $3.00. The orchestra is comprised of volunteers and does not play for profit. They are extremely good as well!

Then on Monday, December 22 at 12:00 noon, there will be a TUBACHRISTMAS concert. The performance will take place at the Texas State Capitol on the South Steps. Registration and rehearsal will be at 9:30 a.m. at the First United Methodist Church – Family Life Center, 13th & Lavaca. Parking is on the street (do not park in the church lot). For more information contact the coordinator, Steve Bryant, at 512-471-0835.

It Has Begun

December.

For Christians, December involves religious observance of the birth of Christ, the “Light of the World.” For Jews, it is Hannukah, celebrating the miracle the Eternal Light of the Temple, which burned for eight days. Pagans call this Solstice, also known as Yule or Saturnalia, a celebration of the new solar year and of the Goddess-mother and her sun-child. Within the African-American community it is Kwanzaa, a celebration of the oneness and goodness of life focusing on seven principles supporting the unity of Black families. Still for many others, Christmas is a secular holiday focused on exchanging gifts. Regardless of one’s religion, December is a season of celebrating light in a time of darkness; of giving joy to others; of eating, drinking, and being merry.

Some things to remember:

  • It’s not a competition; your worth as a person does not depend on the cost of the gift.
  • The commercial industry would like you to become entranced by all the shiny doodads and seduced by the schmaltzy, overproduced ads so that you will spend more money.
  • You don’t have to give things as gifts; you can give service.
  • While it’s nice to send a gift out to all your customers, or everyone in your address book, it is not necessary; they will not forget you if you don’t send them a calendar, bottle of bubbly, or fruitcake. (In fact, they’ll probably thank you for not sending a fruitcake.)
  • Keep this saying by Charles Warner in mind:

    The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value.

Bring this holiday season to a personal level, emphasizing quiet connection with those who are special to you. Share the gift of each others’ attention and affection. If you want to spend money, you might consider gifts to charities in honor of your loved ones.

It is possible to avoid the churn and mania so often associated with this time of year. You need only decide that external appearances matter less than internal experience.