My mother-in-law is in the hospital. A sudden illness from an infection. She’ll be just fine, and for this I’m grateful. But such news is distressing!

One of my cats, Sophie, probably has mammary cancer. She may also have heartworm. One of these will kill her, maybe sooner, maybe later. She has a heart murmur that she wasn’t born with, and her breathing problems may be symptoms of worm infestation in her heart. There’s no really effective treatment to cure heartworm in cats. Because she’s an indoor cat I didn’t think she was vulnerable to heartworm. None of my vets (until the one I saw today) ever suggested prevention. However, it takes only one mosquito bite to infect a cat. There’s almost no treatment for it, but prevention is easy. Do it!

Diagnosing and treating the tumors would require major surgery and possibly chemotherapy (if they are cancerous). Because her first vet spayed her incorrectly at age six months, leaving an ovary in her, the subsequent heat cycles may have contributed to this. She had a second spay surgery when she was three. Two major surgeries is enough, especially given her size. Chemotherapy practically kills human patients. I’m unable to embrace this as a reasonable protocol to put her in the position of enduring.

Sophie weighs barely eight pounds and currently has an excellent life. She’s content, lively. The only distress I observe is a slight panting or wheezing, an occasional cough. I can give her prednisone to ease those symptoms. She is otherwise full of zing. Given that my father-in-law died only six weeks ago, I had an alarm raised regarding my own health, and now these two events, the following quote hit home.

To live in this world, you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal; to hold it against your bones knowing your life depends on it; and when the time comes, to let it go.

–Mary Oliver

And I’m thinkin’… The weather here is gorgeous. I’m working with kids Saturday night, having dinner with friends Sunday. Still haven’t made any art. Perhaps, just perhaps, I will shut down my computer and take a few days to experience this life of mine.