I should think you could be gladder on Monday mornin’ than any other day in the week, because ‘twould be a whole week before you’d have another one!
–Eleanor H. Porter, Pollyanna (1912)
Category Archives: Humanities
The Problem of Stasis
The problem is we think we exist. We think our words are permanent and solid and stamp us forever. That’s not true. We write in the moment. Sometimes when I read poems at a reading to strangers, I realize they think those poems are me. They are not me, even if I speak in the “I” person. They were my thoughts and my hand and the space and the emotions at the time of writing. Watch yourself. Every minute we change. It is a great opportunity. At any point, we can step out of our frozen selves and our ideas and being fresh. That is how writing is. Instead of freezing us, it frees us.
–Natalie Goldberg, Writing Down the Bones (1986)
Words to Ponder #72
He prayed as he breathed, forming no words and making no specific requests, only holding in his heart, like broken birds in cupped hands, all those people who were in stress or grief.
–Ellis Peters, A Morbid Taste for Bones (1977)
Words to Ponder #71
It is typical, in America, that a person’s hometown is not the place where he is living now but is the place he left behind.
–Margaret Mead and Rhoda Metraux, A Way of Seeing (1970)
On Awareness
From lactose incompetent:
Homo Sapiens Sapiens, the scientific name for the human species, translates roughly as “we’re aware that we’re aware”. We understand the concept of time, of past and future, but I wonder if that’s really an advantage and not some sort of evolutionary fluke, a defect in our intelligence. It deprives us of so much joy in life, the ability to live in the now because we’re analyzing and replaying the past and worrying about the future.
Words to Ponder #70
Being a child is largely a flux of bold and furtive guesswork, fixed ideas continually dislodged by scrambling and tentative revision…. All our energy and cunning go into getting our bearings without letting on that we are ignorant and lost.
–Fernanda Eberstadt, Isaac and His Demons (1991)
Rights For Children (Even Big Ones)
Rights For Children
I have the right to be here.
I have the right to be a child.
I have the right to belong to a loving family.
I have the right to play.
I have the right to make a mistake.
I have the right to be treated with respect.
I have the right to proper food, clothing, and cleanliness.
I have the right to learn.
I have the right to tender care when I am sick or hurt.
I have the right to do things for myself and to get help if I need it.
I have the right to express myself without interruption.
I have the right to move freely at my own initiative.
I have the right to make my own friends.
I have the right to make choices.
I have the right to enter into meaningful activities.
I have the right to develop at my own pace and to be unhurried.
I have the right to privacy.
I have the right to be listened to.— Jane Scoggins
I own this in poster form and in my last job, had it hanging on the wall. I counsel adults. Yet the problems adults have are often rooted in hurtful lessons they learned in childhood about who they are, their worth, and their role in life. Many clients have rested their gaze on these words and found their hearts responding to one or more statements. It is often a fruitful threshold for exploration and deepening insight.
Words to Ponder #69
People can say what they like about the eternal verities, love and truth and so on, but nothing’s as eternal as the dishes.
–Margaret Mahy, The Catalogue of the Universe (1985)
Words to Ponder #68
The final word is love.
–Dorothy Day, The Long Loneliness (1952)
Words to Ponder #67
This above all, to refuse to be a victim.
–Margaret Atwood, Surfacing (1972)
Words to Ponder #66
For months they have lain in wait, dim shapes lurking in the forgotten corners of houses and factories all over the country and now they are upon us, sodden with alcohol, their massive bodies bulging with strange green protuberances, attacking us in our homes, at our friends’ homes, at our offices — there is no escape, it is the hour of the fruitcake.
–Deborah Papier, in Insight (1985)
Words to Ponder #65
I read and walked for miles at night along the beach, writing bad blank verse and searching endlessly for someone wonderful who would step out of the darkness and change my life. It never crossed my mind that that person could be me.
–Anna Quindlen, “At the Beach,” Living Out Loud (1988)
Words to Ponder #64
Fortunately analysis is not the only way to resolve inner conflicts. Life itself still remains a very effective therapist.
–Karen Horney, Our Inner Conflicts (1945)
Words to Ponder #63
The fragrance always remains in the hand that gives the rose.
–Heda Bejar, in Peacemaking: Day by Day, vol. 2 (1989)
It Has Begun
December.
For Christians, December involves religious observance of the birth of Christ, the “Light of the World.” For Jews, it is Hannukah, celebrating the miracle the Eternal Light of the Temple, which burned for eight days. Pagans call this Solstice, also known as Yule or Saturnalia, a celebration of the new solar year and of the Goddess-mother and her sun-child. Within the African-American community it is Kwanzaa, a celebration of the oneness and goodness of life focusing on seven principles supporting the unity of Black families. Still for many others, Christmas is a secular holiday focused on exchanging gifts. Regardless of one’s religion, December is a season of celebrating light in a time of darkness; of giving joy to others; of eating, drinking, and being merry.
Some things to remember:
- It’s not a competition; your worth as a person does not depend on the cost of the gift.
- The commercial industry would like you to become entranced by all the shiny doodads and seduced by the schmaltzy, overproduced ads so that you will spend more money.
- You don’t have to give things as gifts; you can give service.
- While it’s nice to send a gift out to all your customers, or everyone in your address book, it is not necessary; they will not forget you if you don’t send them a calendar, bottle of bubbly, or fruitcake. (In fact, they’ll probably thank you for not sending a fruitcake.)
- Keep this saying by Charles Warner in mind:
The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value.
Bring this holiday season to a personal level, emphasizing quiet connection with those who are special to you. Share the gift of each others’ attention and affection. If you want to spend money, you might consider gifts to charities in honor of your loved ones.
It is possible to avoid the churn and mania so often associated with this time of year. You need only decide that external appearances matter less than internal experience.