The deepest experience of the creator is feminine, for it is experience of receiving and bearing.
–Rainer Maria Rilke
Category Archives: Humanities
Nothing But
Taste is nothing but an enlarged capacity for receiving pleasure from works of imagination.
–William Hazlitt
A Compliment
A compliment is a gift, not to be thrown away carelessly, unless you want to hurt the giver.
–Eleanor Hamilton
Guard Well
Guard well within yourself that treasure, kindness. Know how to give without hesitation, how to lose without regret, how to acquire without meanness.
–George Sand
Do Give
Do give books — religious or otherwise — for Christmas. They’re never fattening, seldom sinful, and permanently personal.
–Lenore Hershey
The Most Exquisite
Gratitude is the most exquisite form of courtesy.
–Jacques Maritain
The Excellence of a Gift
The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value.
–Charles Dudley Warner
The Greatest University
What we become depends on what we read after all of the professors have finished with us. The greatest university of all is a collection of books.
–Thomas Carlyle
I Rather Agree
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.
–Galileo Galilei
If You Want to Be Understood
I was misunderstood growing up and have often been misunderstood since, but then so is everyone else. People are busy, and you can’t expect them to drop everything and try to understand you. If you want to be understood, practice kindness and mercy. Kindness is seldom mistaken for anything else. Small kindnesses reverberate a long time in people’s hearts.
–Garrison Keillor
This short column is worth a read; go here to do that.
Five Things You Might Not Know About Me
Dick Richards, the author of Come Gather Round, tagged me for a meme. I’m to write about five things you might not know about me.
- Although I go exclusively by the name Kathryn now, everyone called me Kathy for 25 years (unless I was in trouble with my parents). At age 12, I wanted to make my name (and myself) more special, so I changed the spelling to Kathie. In 1980 I was a finalist in a regional poetry contest, and I went to Wells College in Aurora, New York, to spend the weekend learning about poetry from Bruce Bennett and Dan Masterson (who had recently published On Earth As It Is). The workshop was populated by upper class, privately educated girls from Virginia, Georgia, Delaware, Pennsylvania, Connecticut, and Massachusetts. This was my first opportunity to be away from home alone, so I experimented and introduced myself as Kate. I was Kate for three full days; I liked it, but it didn’t stick. I remained Kathie until my mid-twenties.
When I was about 24, I gave serious consideration to legally changing my name to Kathie. It was a time in my life where I struggled to define myself; I was working in a job that felt too small, living a life that was too tight, still overly concerned with what others thought of me. I’d read an article arguing that women with names ending in “y” or “ie” might be taken less seriously in their professions, and it made sense. It’s a diminutive. I wanted to be substantial. I came to a conclusion: my name is Kathryn. It is on my birth certificate. It is a lovely name with a particularly pretty spelling. Those with the same spelling know that the pronunciation is slightly different. It’s “Kath-ryn” and not “Kath-er-ine.” So I decided to be the name I was given, and I made this known. My family, bless them, accommodated this. I expected them to be the slowest to change, since those who’ve known you longest have the hardest time changing. But in fairly short order that’s how they referred to me and continue to this day. Sometimes they call me Kath — but never Kathie. And you know what? I’m not a Kathy, however it is spelled. I am Kathryn. It suits me.
One intense pet peeve is when people, upon meeting a person, ignore the name given and shorten it into a nickname. I will correct people who call me Kathy after I’ve introduced myself as Kathryn. And though I do prefer my spelling, I am forgiving of other versions, as there are about 2,000 ways to spell my name (slight exaggeration).
- When I was nine years old, I had a love affair with Christmas — in July! Seriously. One summer I filled a composition book — you know, the one with the black and white marbled cover — with drawing after drawing in pencil of various Christmas-related scenes. I drew a manger, scene. I drew me sitting in my pjs on the sofa by our tree. I drew wreathes, ornaments, and bells. I wrote out a wish list for Santa. And I even, that summer, made Christmas decorations from construction paper. I still have all this packed somewhere in a box. Yep, I’ve loved the Yule season since very early on.
- The summer I was five we camped near the Sault Ste. Marie river. My father brought us to the beach. My two older sisters (11 and 12 years old) were in the river farther out. They were jumping up and down and waving at an enormous tanker that was heading for the Soo Locks. That ship created quite an undertow. I was mimicking my sisters, waving madly, and was unaware of the undertow until is swept me into a drop-off. Suddenly I was under water, and I could not swim. Everything happened fast and all is a memory of confusion. I remember the sunlit water, feeling surprised at where I ended up. Maybe I breathed in once. But before long — seconds really — I was yanked up by my eldest sister. The next thing I remember is standing at the edge of the beach crying, feeling scared, wanting my father and mother. Just think… you might never have encountered this here weblog, if my sisters hadn’t noticed what happened. The next summer I learned to swim, and guess what? I learned first by swimming underwater. Most kids fear that and learn it last. But I wanted to control whether I went under water, so I chose to learn underwater so I could do that.
- I was raised a Roman Catholic. I was a sincere believer and very diligent in attending church. I even thought about becoming a nun. I wanted to be a priest for about five seconds until I killed that thought, seeing as how it had no chance in coming true. But still, I wanted to be more involved in mass, so I became a lay reader of scripture. In Catholic mass, the lay readings are usually a passage from the Old Testament and one passage from the New Testament, but never a gospel. Gospels are reserved for priests only to read. In any case, at age 14 I was tired of listening to old white men droning as they read. I wanted the scripture to come alive to the listeners. So I became one, and I felt that when I read I made a contribution, however small.
- I’ve eaten a dog biscuit. It was a game of truth or dare with three girlfriends. I was in my late 30s and had never played truth or dare. It was a sleep-over with these other women, who were all in their mid-20s. (We’d become friends through work, and not long after we parted ways.) I was a reluctant participant. There was a question asked of me that I felt was just nobody’s business, so I took the dare. Let me tell you this: dog biscuits are dry and tasteless, much as I think sawdust would taste. I ate the whole damn thing and choked down a glass of water, and yes, I kept it down. Ugh. After that I decided I was way too old for such games; give me Trivial Pursuit any day.
And there you have it. Now you know five things you probably didn’t know before. You are welcome to play along if you like. Leave a link in the comments if you do. There are some folks I’d like to know more about, though: Laurel, Shirley, Leah, Gerry, and Donna. But the more the merrier!
On The Way To The Library
On The Way to the Library
Two oily crows play chicken with idling cars
at the traffic light. Inches
from a tire, the birds jackhammer
gray pavement for a smashed tidbit.
This is their only task,
to eat six times
one’s weight every day, even
if that meal sits on a four-lane
boulevard. One crow grabs
a prize hunk and rises
with helicopter wings, landing
on the crosswalk light.
The other pecks and pecks again,
unaware of the thrumming metal
bull looming next to it.
The light changes. I drive past.
Visitor From Afar
Yesterday I had a first-time visit with my mother’s cousin (which makes him my second cousin, yes?). He had come from Alaska, where he’s lived over three decades, to visit another relative in Berkeley regarding family genealogy. He’s a frequent visitor to and commenter on this blog, and we’ve been corresponding for a couple of years. So it was a joy to flesh out the relationship literally with in-person conversation over tea. We talked four hours: about family history, life, God, science, death and the possibility of existence after. You know, just a few light topics. He’s widely read and an information maven as I am. He also spoke encouragingly of my quest for a child. I can use all the positive interaction as possible around this. It’s rather nice to hear someone assert that my wish can come true.
On his way back from L.A., where he’s gone to visit another relative for the weekend, he’ll come for another visit Monday in the afternoon, and Husband and I will host dinner. Then he heads back to Alaska the 12th.
Someday I’d like to visit Alaska.
You never know where life will take you… At 23 I had no clue I’d be living in California (nor a desire to). I never imagined I might go to Europe (which I did) or visit a relative in Alaska. So I’m left to wonder what type of interesting and fun things I’ll be doing at 63 that just don’t occur to me now.
When you look back, are you surprised at the turns your path has taken? What are some things you’ve experienced or are part of your life now that you’d never in a million years have imagined for yourself?
Two Ways
There are two ways to slide easily through life; to believe everything or to doubt everything. Both ways save us from thinking.
–Alfred Korzybski
Art Every Day Month – Day 28
This is also my piece for Illustration Friday. This week’s theme is “Invention.” We invent masks to wear around different people: the hard worker at the job, the clever conversationalist at a party. Some of these masks are barely different from who we really are; they add a sheen to one’s self. Other masks completely cover one’s genuine self and present an elaborately different exterior.

