Good readers, I have a confession to make.
I began Week One of The Artist’s Way on Sunday, even though the official start date for this group was agreed to be January 8. I know… this doesn’t demonstrate a very team-oriented, collaborative attitude, does it? I tout how I value community, that I want to co-create community online and in real life, but this action proves me a bit of a hypocrite.
Here’s why I did it. I began reading the preparatory chapters like everyone else. I decided to skim the book and highlight the tasks in each chapter as a way to deepen my commitment. I’m restless, would have been better off if I’d been required to start work weeks ago, because all I do these days is think too much about the future. I’m overly focused on the Two Big Things that begin next week. I want to do something. One way of handling my anxiety about the convergence of the new job and new creative endeavor was to actually start doing the tasks in Week One. It focused my attention and gave me something to delve into.
So there you have it. I’m a week ahead. Out of sync. I’ve contemplated just playing along and either: a) secretly pretending I’m on the same week as everyone for the next 12 weeks or b) waiting out next week entirely while everyone catches up. My problem with option A is that I don’t want to pretend, even to a group of people whom I only know online. Option B feels wrong to me, because I don’t want to lose momentum. It may be the case that I will be so wasted throughout next week from the change and newness that I won’t be up to proceeding further, in which case I’ll then be synchronous with everyone else.
Patience is not my best trait — perseverence, yes, I can plod along quite undaunted once I start something. But the waiting to start is my difficulty. *sigh* Just wanted y’all to know.
By the way, I’ve done my daily pages three times since Sunday. Not a perfect start, but the notable part is that I wanted to write them, and I enjoyed the process. I sort of sidled up to myself with a cup of tea and wrote them. On the days I don’t do them I will just note this and not get distracted. I will not be turned away from well-being by my inner-legalistic-either/or-perfectionist this time.
Hi Kathryn, You came to my blog tonight and left a comment and I really appreciate the help. I wanted you to know that I’ve read your blog and have enjoyed it very much. It’s one of my favorite blogs. I’m excited for you and the start of your new job! I think it is great that you’ve already started the first week of AW. I think the whole point is to find ways to open and keep open the creative channels. It certainly sounds like you are doing that!
About your post:
I don’t think you’ll need to worry too much. I think that with the new things starting next week, you could probably work chapter 2 at half-speed for 2 weeks to get back with the rest of us when we start chapter 3. (Did that make sense?)
About other stuff:
I scanned your pages about “mindfulness” and “a bit about me”, and I think I may try and start a library list too. Whether I succeed or not, it sure looks interesting to see what books others like!
I loved the Artist’s Way for the first few chapters…then came the reading deprivation. I lasted about 2 hours. Good luck! It’s a cool process!
Thank you for your comment on my blog. I think too often the morning pages are a barrier, not because of what they are but because, since they are non-negotiable, any failure or discomfort with them results in the person deciding they can’t do any of it and they just chuck it or give up because they’ve “failed”. I think there are probably good reasons for those pages to be done and that doing them is important, but if it’s a choice between changing/missing them and quitting – well, that “non-negotiable” part is actually a real de-motivator when you hit that wall, when all it really means is that you’re not using one tool and you won’t get the benefits that tool would’ve brought you. So I just figured I’d put something up and maybe it would help even one person – or make someone who’d already made that decision more comfortable.
As far as being ahead, pffft! Who cares? We’re doing this to open to our creativity, not to walk lock-step through an exact process day by day. (Well, I am anyway – and probably others – I can think of lots easier things to do if I just wanted to be stuck doing the same thing as everyone else all the way through.) It may leave you with a bit less support when only those who’ve done a chapter before know what you’re talking about, but they’ll/we’ll catch up the next week. You’re doing it; that’s the important thing, right?