When Claire was born and had colic and could hardly ever be put down, I feared I would never have a few free moments where my arms and hands belonged to me again. Gradually the screaming subsided, and as her personality emerges and interaction with her is so joyful, I find I want to hold her more, especially when she naps.
The problem is that if she learns to sleep best in my arms, that’s how she will need to sleep. Except occasionally I want not to hold her, if I’m hungry or have a business call to make. This sends a mixed message; inconsistency isn’t helpful with children.
We’ve been encouraging Claire to sleep in her crib at least at night, and it’s working. But the other day I was seized with awareness that she is very likely to be my only child, and she won’t be small for very long, nor will she want to be held forever. It makes me tearful. It’s a small grief, a glimpse into the reality of parenting — my job is to love and protect and empower her to leave me someday.
So I want to hold her. Okay?
I held both of my children as much as I liked. The only side effect has been that now they like to cuddle with us and hug each other and be affectionate in general. They sleep in their beds, don’t need to be rocked & have no problems getting to sleep. I think that’s an old wives tale about not holding your baby for fear of something that might possibly happen. I say enjoy your baby and hold her while you can. In fifteen years, she won’t want to be seen with you š