{"id":5674,"date":"2010-07-28T17:28:33","date_gmt":"2010-07-29T00:28:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/?p=5674"},"modified":"2026-01-21T16:33:21","modified_gmt":"2026-01-22T00:33:21","slug":"why-having-a-toddler-is-like-being-at-a-frat-party","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/2010\/07\/28\/why-having-a-toddler-is-like-being-at-a-frat-party\/","title":{"rendered":"Why Having a Toddler Is Like Being at a Frat Party"},"content":{"rendered":"
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  1. There are half-full, brightly-colored plastic cups on the floor in every room. Three are in the bathtub.<\/li>\n
  2. There’s always that one girl, bawling her eyes out in a corner.\n<\/li>\n
  3. It’s best not to assume that the person closest to you has any control over their digestive function.<\/li>\n
  4. You sneak off to the bathroom knowing that as soon as you sit down, someone’s going to start banging on the door.<\/li>\n
  5. Probably 80% of the stains on the furniture contain DNA.<\/li>\n
  6. You’ve got someone in your face at 3 a.m. looking for a drink.<\/li>\n
  7. There’s definitely going to be a fight.<\/li>\n
  8. You’re not sure whether anything you’re doing is right, you just hope it won’t get you arrested.<\/li>\n
  9. There are crumpled-up underpants everywhere.<\/li>\n
  10. You wake up wondering exactly how and when the person in bed with you got there.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    There are half-full, brightly-colored plastic cups on the floor in every room. Three are in the bathtub. There’s always that one girl, bawling her eyes out in a corner. It’s best not to assume that the person closest to you has any control over their digestive function. You sneak off to the bathroom knowing that […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[214,13,34],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5674","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-domestic-arts","category-humor","category-motherhood"],"post_mailing_queue_ids":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5674","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5674"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5674\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11786,"href":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5674\/revisions\/11786"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5674"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5674"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kathrynpetroharper.com\/mindfullife\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5674"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}