Men Being Ladylike

Posted Monday, October 21st, 2019 @ 11:21 am by Kathryn
Categories: Journal, Quotes, Social Science

Hello, the men. My advice on modern masculinity would be to look at all those traits you believe are feminine and interrogate why you are so obsessed with being the opposite. Because this idea that to be a man you have to be the furthest away from being a woman that you possibly can is really weird.

The quote above is just part of a brilliant observation by Hannah Gadsby, who was invited to tell men what she would advise them on behalf of women. Her message resonates so much with me that I am struggling with the temptation to copy and paste the entire thing in the post. Out of respect for copyright, however, I’ll just have to trust that you will go read it here: Hannah Gadsby On Why Men Should Be More Ladylike.

A Reminder

Posted Monday, October 21st, 2019 @ 11:11 am by Kathryn
Categories: Journal, Quotes, Spirit

Have you ever been loved? I bet you have been loved so much and so deeply that you have become blasé about how much grace it confers.

So let me remind you: To be loved is a privilege and prize equivalent to being born. If you’re smart, you pause regularly to bask in the astonishing knowledge that there are many people out there who care for you and want you to thrive and hold you in their thoughts with fondness.

Animals, too: You have been the recipient of their boundless affection. The spirits of allies who’ve left this world continue to send their tender regards, as well.

Do you “believe” in angels and other divine beings? Whether or not you do, there are hordes of them beaming their uncanny consecrations your way. You are awash in torrents of love.

-Rob Breszny

dharma - art every day month 08 - day 27

Middle School

Posted Thursday, September 12th, 2019 @ 9:19 am by Kathryn
Categories: Journal, Motherhood, Social Science, Spirit

Listening to my daughter talk about her feelings and the dynamics of kid interaction at school, I realize the following:

  1. Middle school is “Lord of the Flies” harsh even when it’s a good school;
  2. People can be really judgmental, including my kid;
  3. A middle schooler wants more than anything to be accepted; the hardest thing to do is to befriend someone who is an “outcast,” because you risk your own social safety;
  4. I suck at listening, despite being a psychotherapist (psycho therapist?);
  5. All my childhood wounds are activated;
  6. I have to WORK REALLY HARD to keep my mouth shut, my heart open, and to accept I do not have control over this.

BEING PRESENT with someone else’s suffering, especially when that someone is the most precious treasure of my life, is the hardest soul task I’ve encountered.

Doing All The Things

Posted Wednesday, September 11th, 2019 @ 4:27 pm by Kathryn
Categories: Journal

I struggle to balance my activities. It seems to me that there are some that I can do every single day without fail, and some I would like to do every day, but can’t manage.

Autonomic bodily activities (breathing, digesting, excreting) and survival tasks (eating, sleeping) are guaranteed to happen. Duh, right?

But then there are things that help my soul, my physical and mental health, that I just don’t get to each day. So I prioritize.

Everyday I:

  • brush teeth
  • drink coffee
  • meditate 5-30 minutes
  • read (book, magazines)

Other things I would like to do every day:

  • make art
  • work out or take a walk

Things I ought to probably do every day:

  • shower
  • clean or tidy one area of the house
  • interact with people

The thing about making art is that I like to get lost in the process. This takes time. There is not always a chunk of free time for it. Working out is similar. I can get some steps in, but a dedicated sustained workout is not always feasible. And yet, both of them feel nearly as necessary as food. I get depressed when I don’t do them. I have gone months without doing either. Everyone around me had to bear the result.

Regarding people, I interact with my husband and daughter, of course. I like solitude. Yet sometimes I get more of it than I need. I can tell, because I start to feel a little disembodied.

It Matters

Posted Sunday, June 30th, 2019 @ 12:04 am by Kathryn
Categories: Community, Journal, Quotes

“It all matters. That someone turns out the lamp, picks up the windblown wrapper, says hello to the invalid, pays at the unattended lot, listens to the repeated tale, folds the abandoned laundry, plays the game fairly, tells the story honestly, acknowledges help, gives credit, says good night, resists temptation, wipes the counter, waits at the yellow, makes the bed, tips the maid, remembers the illness, congratulates the victor, accepts the consequences, takes a stand, steps up, offers a hand, goes first, goes last, chooses the small portion, teaches the child, tends to the dying, comforts the grieving, removes the splinter, wipes the tear, directs the lost, touches the lonely, is the whole thing. What is most beautiful is least acknowledged. What is worth dying for is barely noticed.”

— Laura McBride, We Are Called to Rise

Measure of Health

Posted Saturday, June 29th, 2019 @ 11:03 pm by Kathryn
Categories: Community, Journal, Quotes

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.”

–Jiddu Krishnamurti

How to Find Peace

Posted Saturday, June 15th, 2019 @ 9:19 am by Kathryn
Categories: Buddhism, Journal, Quotes

Thoughts — and feelings triggered by thoughts — are mutable and impermanent, and yet because we humans incorrectly identify our being with our thinking, we construct a false notion of ourselves out of ideas and memories that have no actual substance. No wonder the ego is called “the false self.” The false self — the thinking mind — is continuously talking to itself, disturbing itself, even lying to itself. Reimagining the past or fantasizing about the future. Setting up expectations that aren’t met, then casting judgment and blame. Struggling every step of the way to stop struggling. Naturally, it doesn’t work.

–Karen Mazen Miller, How to Look at a Wall

So Tenderly

Posted Saturday, June 15th, 2019 @ 8:54 am by Kathryn
Categories: Journal, Quotes

It happens
all the time in heaven,

And some day
It will begin to happen
Again on earth –

That men and women
who are married,

And men and men
who are
Lovers,

And women and women
Who give each other
Light,

Often will get down
on their knees

And while so tenderly
Holding their lover’s hand,

With tears in their eyes,
Will sincerely speak, saying,

“My dear,
How can I be
more loving to you;

How can I be more
Kind?”

~ Hafiz

A Break

Posted Thursday, June 13th, 2019 @ 7:45 am by Kathryn
Categories: Journal, Nature

Written last night, After a several day “extreme heat” spell.
————-
Hello, 63 degrees. I feel you gossiping with the trees. My windows are all grinning widely waiting for the breeze.
————-
A photo from last summer at Hume Lake…

DSC06361

Half Acre

Posted Tuesday, June 11th, 2019 @ 12:13 am by Kathryn
Categories: Journal, Spirit

Half Acre

I am holding half an acre
Torn from the map of Michigan
And folded in this scrap of paper
Is a land I grew in
Think of every town you’ve lived in
Every room, you lay your head
And what is it that you remember?
Do you carry every sadness with you
Every hour your heart was broken
Every night the fear and darkness
Lay down with you
A man is walking on the highway
A woman stares out at the sea
And light is only now just breaking
So we carry every sadness with us
Every hour our heart were broken
Every night the fear and darkness
Lay down with us
But I am holding half an acre
Torn from the map of Michigan
I am carrying this scrap of paper
That can crack the darkest sky wide open
Every burden taken from me
Every night my heart unfolding
My home

Hem