Archive for the 'Journal' Category

Body Project

Friday, April 29th, 2016

I’ve been involved in my body project for 13 weeks now. Eventually I will stop counting weeks, because it will simply have become a way of living. Until I reach my goal, however, there is value for me in counting. So: in 13 weeks, I have shed 19.2 pounds and 12.25 inches. I now fit […]

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Evolution of Spirit

Thursday, April 28th, 2016

So an interesting thing happened for me after Prince died. A memory was sparked of a friendship at that time in my life. I had not thought of this friend in about 30 years. We were in high school, had crushes on each other, were deeply religious and got to know each other in this […]

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Random Guy

Thursday, April 28th, 2016

I feel like the last post was heavy, and so I’m lightening it up a bit here. My darling girl drew this. I enjoy the illustration, and I especially love the simplicity and quirkiness of the story.

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Old Wounds and Misandry

Tuesday, April 26th, 2016

On a deep fundamental level, I don’t like men. Part of me regards them as Other. Threatening. Inherently dangerous. Suspect. There are sound reasons why I feel this way. I don’t judge this part of myself, and I haven’t succeeded in healing it yet. I acknowledge and allow it to be. As I watched the […]

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Maya

Tuesday, April 26th, 2016

Yes. Yes. I am reminded of this lately. The only one who won’t leave you is your self. “Everyone you trust, everyone you think you can count on, will eventually disappoint you. When left to their own devices, people lie and keep secrets and change and disappear, some behind a different face or personality, some […]

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The Cost of Growing Up

Monday, April 4th, 2016

Most people don’t grow up. It’s too damn difficult. What happens is most people get older. That’s the truth of it. They honor their credit cards, they find parking spaces, they marry, they have the nerve to have children, but they don’t grow up. Not really. They get older. But to grow up costs the […]

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Loss Aversion

Tuesday, March 8th, 2016

I have reached an ambivalent state in my weight loss process. I am so accustomed to 16 years of heaviness. It’s interesting to note that I didn’t gain all this weight until I met Hub and life improved in many ways — materially and psychologically. Until this morning I haven’t understood what happens, why I […]

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Pondering the Soul

Thursday, March 3rd, 2016

Do souls exist before they are incarnated? What is a soul? I perceive soul as energy. When it is embodied, it expresses through the filter of a personality. Personality is shaped by genetics, temperament, and experiences. Does a soul retain the particular “flavor” of personality after the body dies? I would like to think so. […]

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Mostly Nothing Much

Monday, February 22nd, 2016

“In the end, people don’t view their life as merely the average of all its moments — which, after all, is mostly nothing much plus some sleep. For human beings, life is meaningful because it is a story. A story has a sense of a whole, and its arc is determined by the significant moments, […]

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Learning to Be an Includer

Thursday, February 4th, 2016

Experiencing bullying at school is traumatic. When a child comes from a loving, stable family with empathetic parents, it is still hard on a child. When a child comes from a family system that is authoritarian or neglectful, the distress is even worse; often there is bullying ongoing in the home as well, and the […]

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