I’m not in the mood to write. The last couple weeks have been a little challenging. First I could have no contact with Husband until he proved immune to chicken pox, since I am not. And of course the blood test took time, so we avoided each other for a week.

My wrists are sore, my fingers often numb from pregnancy-induced carpal tunnel. When I knit, hold a book, hold a phone, or do anything repetitive for very long my hands tingle and go numb. I even have trouble spreading peanut butter on toast. I don’t have much strength in my hands and have trouble picking up grocery bags and such.

I took a one mile, slow-paced walk on Saturday and my knee has hurt since. It hurts to put weight on it, to bend it, or to turn it. I haven’t walked again since I don’t want to worsen the injury. I experience a sharp pain in another area when I get up from the dining room chair; it’s either (or both) the Pubofemoral Ligament or the Iliofemoral Ligament in my right hip. It feels as though my leg will collapse under me or I’ll tear something. I’m huge and fat and cumbersome and slow.

I lose my breath easily just going up a couple flights of stairs. My heart beats heavily.

And on top of all this, I failed the glucose blood test for gestational diabetes by four points. To check and see if this isn’t a fluke, they want me to fast for 12 hours and then take another dose of glucose and then poke me three four times over three hours. This means fasting for a total of 15 hours (at least). I cannot physically tolerate this. The other option is to skip the test, just assume I have diabetes, and see the nutritionist. I know how to eat well. I’ve been careful to do so. I’ve gained little weight. Diet and exercise are the treatment, and I’m vexed because the exercise is compromised by the risk of injury.

My hormones are doing their pregnancy waltz, so I’m an emotional wreck on and off. I cry over the slightest provocation sometimes. I feel un-lovely and worn.

And there’s three more months of this. Yay.

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10 Comments on “Avoidance”

  1. GreenishLady Says:

    Aw, Honey. I hope all these things will pass soon. It can’t be easy coping with all that. Wish I could offer some comfort, but can only send out these hopes for you.

  2. leah Says:

    sending much hugs and love your way!!

  3. marta Says:

    Hey, each trimester is different. Trust me, I know how you feel, but you walking around and making life at the same time. I don’t care how many billions of women have done it across time, it is amazing. If weren’t, people wouldn’t be unique. We’d all come out as cookie cutter images of each other.

    You’ll get through it. You’ve gotten through harder times with no great magic prize at the end. Love.

  4. gerry rosser Says:

    It’ll be worth it.

  5. Liora Says:

    Ouch, honey. I don’t know about all of that other than the carpal tunnel syndrome. I’d suggest not knitting til the baby is delivered. I’ve had surgery on my right hand (didn’t help a bit), and have packed up my knitting needles for Goodwill since my hands go numb for days any time I try to knit. A couple things that have been extremely helpful are SmartGloves and a cheap little exercise thing called the Cat’s Paw. Physical therapy did more for me than medication and surgery for the CTS, and the Cat’s Paw mimicked some of the exercises in PT. The inflammation and numbness definitely improved with a combination of that and the SmartGlove.

    The best thing is this is all likely temporary. Just three months. Haven’t the last three gone by pretty fast?

  6. Liora Says:

    Okay, I went and found these things. They sell the SmartGlove on Amazon, but only one size. I use the size small. The web site below has you measure the size of your wrist/hand and will suggest the right size based on that.


    And the Cat’s Paw is really good and really cheap ($9.99). It’s probably a good idea to use if you like to knit regularly even after your baby comes. http://www.catspaw.com/orders.php

    Hope this helps. Peace.

  7. Diana Says:

    So sorry you’re having such a rough time. Hang in there!

  8. Laurel Says:

    I think it was Bette Davis who said (and it’s one of my favorite quotes):

    Old age ain’t for sissies.

    I think the quote might be changed thusly:

    Motherhood ain’t for sissies.

    This is a courageous thing you’re doing, kiddo. You’re bringing a child into this world.

    So, as Dan Rather used to intone (his nightly sign off for his newscast):


  9. la peregrina Says:

    Do not think you are un-lovely. All pregnant are lovely, whether they think so or not.

  10. donna Says:

    Every third month pretty much sucks. Third month, I had morning sickness so bad. That went away and I was good til the six month when I hurt like hell. My ninth month I got hypertension with the second pregnancy, and it never really went away. You’ll get a couple good months now, and the last month will be sheer hell. Fun, huh? ;^)

    Get some wrist braces for those wrists. Your ligaments are all stretched out right now, so you’ll be able to expand enough to carry and birth the kid. My feet grew a half size longer and wider with each kid. My ribs expanded from a size 8 to a size 12, and never went back. With my first pregnancy, I went hypermobile and ended up twisting my neck and shoulder so badly one night I had to go see a rheumatologist. Good pain meds, though. ;^) Hard to find the ones that won’t hurt the kidlet. They did seem to calm him down a bit, though – he was a barrel-roller.

    Teach hubby to give you a good massage – it’s worth it. Get those feet up and night and get ’em rubbed. A lot. Maybe the hands, too. Oh and a good pregnancy pillow is a *must*.

    Oh, and that ugly part? I got propositioned by a guy who had only ever seen me in my car coming into work every morning – he left a note on my car asking me out. I wrote him back saying I was eight months pregnant, but that I sure did appreciate his note – it made my day!

    You are *gorgeous* dear, you just don’t realize it….