Why I’m Not Out Saving the World At the Moment

Recently a comment was left inquiring what had happened to all my great ideas to volunteer, start a listening ministry, be a literacy coach, and work in the non-profit arena. And it occurred to me that I have been quiet about these inspiring ideas for several months.

In October, when Husband and I saw a counselor to discuss the fertility issues and we decided that yes indeed we want a biological child, he requested that I not write the blow-by-blow account of the journey. Since the endeavor involves him, it was totally reasonable to ask. There are lots of blogs out there to provide that vicarious experience, one of them being A Little Pregnant. As for working, we agreed that my job is to conceive and carry a successful pregnancy. The stress of my last job exacted a toll, and we’re certain that pregnancy and working are not a good combination for me at this time. I am very fortunate that our lifestyle allows us this option.

Besides, the fertility issues got moved to the back burner. After my job ended, the holidays were suddenly upon us. We all know how distracting they can be from our usual intentions for life. Then came the sudden need to find a new home, to pack all our stuff, and to get moved and settled. My job, essentially, has been to do these things. I do meet with my learner once a week to teach her ESL, and I enjoy it very much. To honor confidentiality I abstain from writing about our relationship and work. As for the listening ministry, I’ve got interest but the not the involvement with the church, because I have been slow and lax in connecting to that community. I’ve also been diligently working on a big project of my own; it occupies my life and is changing me in ways I never expected. As I responded to the commenter, there are seasons in a person’s life; sometimes engagement is external in the community and sometimes it’s internal and within the self.

In this blog I usually write about what’s current to me and pepper those entries with occasional quotes or photos. Lately my life consists of picking up knitting again, reading good books, making a home, and seeing friends. My dear friend Eileen has been besieged with health problems. Not only is she undergoing chemotherapy and radiation for breast cancer, several weeks ago she fell and broke her humerus bone (shoulder), which left her with the use of one arm. She has no ability to drive to the many medical appointments that shape her life, and it’s difficult to cook one-handed. All this is made more complex by the layers of malaise that accompany chemo treatments: nausea, dizziness, anxiety, fatigue, and body-wracking pain. I, along with her other friends and family, have been helping out. I may not be improving the world in general by doing this, but it’s important nonetheless.

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4 Comments on “Why I’m Not Out Saving the World At the Moment”

  1. Eden Says:

    Well think of all the knitting projects you’ll undertake now 🙂

  2. marta Says:

    You are saving the world. Just because you’re not doing it in any of the obvious ways, doesn’t make it less so.

  3. leah Says:

    i agree, you are saving the world. ((big hugs)) that photo of the road is so cool and so california!

  4. eileen Says:

    you are certainly “saving my world” just be being in it….. you calls,visits, caring and healing energy make my chemo and broken sholder journey a bit easier
    many blessings and much love
    i am glad you are in my life….