Inert

The writer in me is hibernating, I think. I come to this blog with the intention to write and instead find myself wordless and frozen. I consider writing about my day, but everything I do is so mundane I can’t bring myself to typing the details. Who wants to read about how I arranged the backyard furniture and plants? Well, here’s the thing: the topic I want to write about, the subject that is central to my life write now, I cannot elaborate on at this point. In the near future I will. Of course, as my family teases me, I’m as subtle as a hammer, and by this time some astute readers may infer what’s going on. It’s hard not to write about an elephant in the room, especially when it’s sitting on top of one. And all my other ideas are squeezed out! So if I end up writing about the weather, or if my posts seem a little lean, that’s why.

The wind is blustery this night. We are promised rain tomorrow (100% chance) and possibly thunderstorms. Hah! I’ll believe that when I see it. In the Bay Area, they don’t know thunderstorms. Now Texas, that’s a state that knows how to unleash climate armageddon. I’m nostalgic for the drama.

Having finished The Mists of Avalon, my interest in paganism is sparked again. I own a series of books published by Llewellyn Press that provide the history and suggestions for rites of the various Sabbats in the year. The next Sabbat is Ostara (Easter), so I’ve pulled Ostara: Customs, Spells & Rituals for the Rites of Spring off my bookshelf. (Yes we have unpacked all of our books at last!) The vernal equinox is technically the date of the Sabbat, but since Easter shifts around the calendar each year, sometimes they don’t fall on the same date (or month). As for myself, I’m not a practicing pagan (or even very learned about it), but I’m intrigued by the customs behind the holidays that I celebrated when I was a Christian. The practice of honoring seasons and enacting small rituals to celebrate the natural rhythm of life and the earth appeal greatly. In Austin, Husband and I had egg decorating parties at our house. It was so much fun! We don’t have the large table or the big dining room anymore for such a gathering, but I really wish we did. Maybe I’m hobbled by my perspective. Just because the space is smaller doesn’t mean we couldn’t have a small party, or people come in shifts, or something. Hmm.

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8 Comments on “Inert”

  1. AnnMarie Says:

    Why can’t you write about being pregnant???

  2. Diana Says:

    Yes, when you can’t write about the one thing that is dominating your mind, it makes you freeze up. I hope that you’re at least writing in a secret place, just for yourself!

  3. gerry rosser Says:

    Whatever the elephant is, I hope you can wrestle it into submission.

    Sounds like all the changes in your life are affecting you profoundly.

  4. Eden Says:

    Easter is the most pagan mainstream holiday. The date is determined thus: Easter falls on the first Sunday after the first full moon after the vernal equinox. That should tip folks off 😉

    Both holidays are all about renewal and rebirth and both are very beautiful. The egg coloring, the bunnies (and chicks and lambs), all that has a pagan origin. So there’s really very little to adjust in one’s way of thinking. I’ll get that ritual you asked about to you ASAP.

  5. Karen Says:

    I know that elephant. It has come to tell you that you can do, and write, and be, anything at all.

  6. Emy Says:

    I thought I knew what was going on, but I didn’t want to ask. I figured you’d reveal everything when it was safe to do so. Gentle squishy hugs, and let me know if you want to have coffee (decaf, *wink*) or something.

  7. Meredith Says:

    A friend tells me that this thing, this thing that longs to be talked about and shared, is a messgae from our soul, yearning to be revealed. I’ll be checking back to see what this grand mysterious elephant looks like…

    Blessings,
    ~M

  8. Brenda Says:

    Positive thoughts for you and the white elephant! 🙂